Taylor Swift is so right about you.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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