actually, I'm a sock model
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
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