The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize
