Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Congratulations! We have a period
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