Kiss
Puke
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
