Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
