you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
