They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I think a kid would responsible me up
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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