we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
My dick has a subreddit
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
