All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
even my farts smell like vagina
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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