Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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