Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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