Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
