YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize