im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
