After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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