i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize