Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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