Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I want to make a zoo with you.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I want a musical about memes.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
