so explain again why im purple
no
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
