yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize