I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
