Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
