i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
