South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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