do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
