Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Fuck appropriateness.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
