xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
