I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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