The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
