yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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