i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I currently don't understand fingers.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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