laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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