"it" just moved
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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