He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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