ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
