I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
There r osticjed everywhere
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
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