So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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