My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Randomize
