dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
