The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize