UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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