dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Randomize
