M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Randomize
