I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
