he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
