come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
