somebody snuck up and got me drunk
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
