im holly from the hills drunk
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
