Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
