Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
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